PSA: Perfect Stories

Note: Every now and again I have to do this public service announcement…

I’ve been blogging since the internet came on an AOL cd in the mail. 

That’s a long time.

And one thing I always try to do is remain transparent. The good. The bad. The ugly. The not so ugly. Because much like pictures, blogs only offer a snapshot of the writer’s life. Unless I strap a live cam to me 24/7, you have no idea what is happening all the time in my life. When I write, it’s out of context. It’s a sliver of my reality that I’m sharing with you. 

And there’s nothing wrong with that. But I firmly belive in painting as realistic of a story that I can. My marriage is not perfect. I get my submissive needs fulfilled with emotional affairs. I struggle with anxiety and perfectionism and control. I am a mom. I have stretch marks. I’ll be 30 next year. I’m African American.

And I’m a submissive bratty little. 

I ventured on Tumblr again (haven’t been on in weeks) and found myself chuckling as I scrolled through all of the self-identified Daddy Doms and babygirls I follow. Everyone was white, babygirls were under 5’5 and between 98-105 pounds, DDs were older gentlemen who always know when to use “princess” in a sentence.

Yeah. If one discovered DD/lg through Tumblr and didn’t fit those molds…man. I feel sorry for them. Much like Fetlife and Reddit and DDLG forums and so on, Tumblr focuses on what the fantasy should be. But where are the brown littles? The in-between curvy and fat littles? The mom littles? The 6 ft tall littles? The overweight Doms? The shy Daddies? The Sirs that don’t own a suit or a dungeon in the basement? 

You know- the not so “picture perfect”fucking people who make up this lifestyle?

I’ve always encouraged my readers on all of my blogs for the past 15 years to not get caught up in what you see or read. And I stand by that today. Not every blogger follows the code of honesty and transparency. Which is fine, it’s their blog and they can do what they want. But it is the reader’s responsibilty to approach their work with a heavy dose of skepticism. 

And I’ve been victim of doing this as well. I’ll read the posts and bemoan how unfair it is that my life can’t be just like that. I have to remind myself that I know better. 

When I write, there is no fact check unless you know me in real life. Noone is standing over your shoulder pointing out what’s true in my post and what’s bullshit. Ditto for every blog, article and video you come across.

So if you’re new to this and you’re trapiezing around the internet learning about BDSM remember to take shit at face value. Get some interesting thoughts, jot some notes and then move on. Do not model your life after some internet stranger. Be brave and choose your own adventure. It’s always worth it. 

And if you’re not picture perfect THAT’S ok! You can find that Dom or sub that thinks you’re perfect for them. I swear it. On my left tit. And that’s my favorite one so you know I’m serious. 😉