Binge / Purge

Since I don’t have a lot of little friends in real life, I spend a lot of time reading kink forums so that I can see what other littles are up to.

One of the things I keep coming across is warnings about the binge/purge.

If you’ve ever struggled to accept your kink (like I have), you might go through periods of indulging it in…only to then go through periods of repressing your urges. A lot of times, this repression is brought on by feelings of shame, guilt, and even self hatred. You hate feeling “abnormal” and hope that if you stop “indulging” in your kinks, they’ll simply go away.

Most veteran kinksters know that isn’t true. After a period of repression, you will probably find yourself binging again. Then after awhile the purging starts.

The obvious way to get out of this cycle is just to accept that your kinks are who you are, and you can’t change them anymore than you can change your skin color.

But that’s easier said than done. Those negative feelings can be powerful and crippling. I drafted this post a month ago and left in sitting. Today, while browsing my forums, I came across an AB who was an active member and had been for years. He wrote a goodbye post, saying that his fetish was unhealthy and not a turn on for him anymore. He was through with it all!

The post reeked of despair and my heart automatically went out to him. Others chimed in, reminding him that nothing good can come of the binge/purge cycle and that he should try to reconcile with himself that this is who he is. He didn’t reply, but I hope he listened.

And I’m trying to do the same as well. Slowly but surely.

7 thoughts on “Binge / Purge

    1. It makes me sad and happy to hear that. Sad that so many of us struggle with the balance, but happy that there are veterans out there like you who can offer encouragement to us newbies.


      1. Well, I thought to myself “there’s no use in getting angry over something you cannot change”.
        So, I just read more and more articles and blogs about people like me. This way I was able to see that there are others just like me and that I’m not the only one feeling the same way. So, that helped me calm down a bit too.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Fair enough. And that is why I write this blog.
        So that other people will find it and know that they are not alone. There has to be a defining moment (a turning point) where you stop fighting who you are and start embracing it. It sounds like you have. I hope that I can get there one day as well.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. That’s why I started my blog too! Specifically so people can see the non-sexual side of it. Let me know if you ever have any questions!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s