I’m constantly questioning why and how I react the way I do when it comes to being submissive. It helps my ENTJ brain feel better when I can apply logic to it.
Daddy and I had a talk today, where he expressed concern over being too hard on me and I reassured him that he wasn’t. I told him if anything, he could stand to be even harder on me! He’s not a softie. And I’ve always been able to tell when he’s holding back or adding an “lol” to the end of something in hopes of ‘softening the blow’. But the thing is, I don’t need him to soften anything. He knows me well enough to know when I’m upset. I want him to unleash his full dominant personality. So I reassured him that he wasn’t scaring me or hurting my feelings or anything that would make me run away. He seemed to be comforted by that. (See? Daddies need reassuring too!)
Anyway. After the discussion was over, I teased him by telling him that we were now going to switch roles since he was having so much angst. I would be the boss, he would be my submissive. He wasn’t having it. I kept poking at him, telling him that he was being sassy and would have to write lines. He wasn’t having that either and instead flipped the switch by asking me what I was having for lunch (y’all know I hate lunch). When I replied caffeine, he said, “Kitten, you had damn well better eat something other than coffee for lunch. Something healthy and nutritional. Well…at least semi healthy.”
I scoffed. “Or what?”
“I’ll use the nipple clamps.”
“I totally would. I’ve been dying to see them so just give me an excuse.” My pussy instantly got wet. I shivered. My nipples hardened. All from a rule…and a stated consequence. I conceded immediately and got up to find food.
Later on, as I was eating, I thought about it. What was it that made me react like that? I found this article where he lists out triggers and found myself nodding along. Some of my personal triggers are:
-Being called pet, little girl, young lady.
-Being growled at. Period. For anything. For sneezing too loud lol.
-Carrying out punishments. Nothing gets me in a submissive head space like having to put my nose in the corner or kneeling for a certain period of time.
-Having my personal space invaded by a dominant personality (only works with men). Bossman does this a lot. He likes to get right next to me. If at any point I’m getting too mouthy, he’ll sometimes (if he’s not enjoying it) get in my personal space, lower his voice to almost a whisper and tell me to stop it.
A few things happen here:
1) He instantly overwhelms my senses. I get nervous by his proximity. I can see everything- his eye color, the three day stubble. I can smell him. He’s taller than me so he’s usually looking down at me and he never breaks eye contact. Instead, when he’s that close I start to fidget almost immediately and then look away.
2) He forces me to be quiet and focus on him. When he lowers his voice to almost a whisper, I have to shut up to hear what he’s saying. My eyes drop to his lips.
3) The moment becomes intimate. In those brief seconds, his attention is zeroed in on me. No one else. There’s not a submissive on this planet that doesn’t relish that feeling from a dominant, sexual or not.
And then it’s over. I’m breathless and flustered and attempting to right any wrongs I made with my smart mouth. He usually backs away and smirks, very much aware of my change in attitude. Fucker.
If you’re submissive, what are some of your triggers? If you’re dominant, what have you noticed about your subs? Always curious to hear what others experience.