I woke up at 1:30 am from a nightmare. I waffled for a moment and then picked up my phone and sent a message to Daddy. He’s 8 hours ahead of me, so he replied back immediately. But not the way I wanted. I wanted him to tell me it was ok, I was safe, he’d take care of the monster under the bed.
That’s not Daddy’s style.
He told me he was sorry I had a nightmare.
That’s it. Nothing more.
I was feeling pretty little by that point and so I did what I usually do when I’m upset- I threw a tantrum. A long one. A two hour tantrum.
I poked and prodded and mocked and stuck my tongue out. I tiptoed the line of bratty and disrespectful. I wanted him to know he wasn’t the boss of me. That he couldn’t make me do anything. I expected him to lose his temper. I wanted to prove to him (and myself) that I was indeed too much for him. I wanted to prove to myself that I didn’t deserve a good Daddy.
Because truth is, he scares the shit out of me. He seems to be exactly what I need. He hasn’t lied yet. He hasn’t backed down. He hasn’t disappeared. He’s been respectful and patient and open. He meets me toe to toe and often outmatches me all the while telling me how beautiful, smart and special I am.
I’m fucking terrified.
So I gave him my all. I unleashed my inner beast. And he took it all. Didn’t bother him one bit. He let me tire myself out and then instead of telling me off…he told me he wished he was there to give me a hug, a kiss and tuck me back in.
Caught off guard, I brought up one of the last times we played when he said I wasn’t his…yet.
“I don’t remember me saying that, at least not lately. What I do remember saying the other day is that you are mine now. That you are safe with me. Do you remember that?”
I admitted I did. He continued to calm me down, talked me through an orgasm until I passed out from exhaustion.
My punishment for last night? Today I have to wear his mark on me. Because he’s going to get it through my thick skull that I belong to him…one way or another.